Monday, April 15, 2013

How to Eat Cheap

Life is hard. Sometimes you don't have a dime to your name and you know there aren't any paychecks coming your way any time soon. When life is throwing the curveballs, it's time to cinch up your belt and resort to You Know Funny's guide to living on a wing and a prayer.
1. No throwing away cash on expensive drinks! You will only be drinking water. This may seem obvious, but a lot of times, when money is tight, people wind up tossing back a few extra to curb depressing feelings. Resist the temptation! Save that money! As a bonus, staying sober may help you to land some extra work on the side.
2. Things to buy at the grocery. Nothing! Just wait until there are free food samples and keep circling.
3. To make the most out of the food sample idea, expand on it by finding out if there are any galas at local museums or galleries. Get dressed up real nice and go rub shoulders with the high rollers. Be sure to stuff your pockets with cheese and crackers.
4. Find out if there are any homeless meal giveaways in your area. Get dressed up real pathetically and try not to touch or be touched by any of the motley assembly you find there.
5. Start a food drive for poor Hungarians. Sit outside the supermarket and collect the cans. At the end of the day, declare that no one is Hungarian for a good meal more than you and run off with your spoils.
6. Try your hand at working if you can get a job. Temporary work is best in your position. You'll be able to work long enough to not be hungry so that you can start the cycle all over again!

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