Friday, July 30, 2010

'The Last Man Standing' television pitch

‘You know funny’ has thrown their bid in for the next prime time television programme. We can only hope that the big t.v. execs make the right decision.

'The Last Man Standing' reality t.v. show competition pitch.
“Are you the Achilles of our day? A hero just a heel short of immortality?
Perhaps you know you are, but it has to be proven first. And the way to prove it?
Take the ultimate challenge with ‘The Last Man Standing Competition.’
And since the competition is televised, you’ll be proving your masculinity to the entire nation back home!
Run the 100 meter dash against Jamaicans, chuck spears against real Zulu, try to grow a better beard than Abrahim. Get karate kicked in a secret Chinese dojo. The competition lasts 1000 days, spanning the entire globe, and guarantees that the last man standing is the true hero of our age. You’ll be kept awake for fifty days straight in a Afghani prison camp, tied to a chair and screamed at. Will you give up the position of your comrades? We’ll see!”
This show will have no immunities and no safety net. Unlike so many fraudulent reality shows, the t.v. crew will never help the contestants. During the ‘build your own raft and sail across the pacific’ competition, if a tempest wipes out all the competitors, the t.v. crew will merely get the best footage they can and chalk the losses up to weakness. How else will we know who ‘The Last Man Standing’ is?
The winner will receive a laurel, his own book deal, and 5 years of psychological counseling.
The surviving losers will be dropped off in outer Mongolia with only a compass and a water bottle in order to redeem themselves during, ‘The Last Man Standing: season 2.”

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